Buzzed Pillow Talk

We were both fairly buzzed as we lied in bed with our legs intertwined beneath the covers. We held hands and talked for a while, simply being happy, laughing and present with one another. Somehow we reached the topic of former lovers and past relationships. Paddy named off some of the females he was with, where it went wrong and he never shied away from his own mistakes that caused issues. (Another reason why I love that dork. He doesn’t make himself look like some perfect person. He knows he’s flawed and doesn’t hide it.) Some stories that were being shared were either hilarious or completely mind fucked me because I wasn’t expecting to hear how some situations unfolded.

(I wish I could share them here, but I didn’t ask him if I could discuss the encounters and/or horror stories on my site. I’ll ask him later and, if given permission, post the stories on a future post.)

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Credit: Becca Tapert

That being said, after our discussion, I began to think of something and I would like some opinions. Because we were both buzzed, him more so than me, should I have stopped him from telling me such personal stories? It may not be a big deal to some, but what if there was a reason why those stories weren’t shared when he was completely sober? I may be overthinking it too much because overthinking/analyzing is what I do regularly, but I’m genuinely curious to know what others would have done or not done.

 

Our Diet Bet

My boyfriend Paddy* and I have been complaining for a while about how we want to drop some pounds. We’re both overweight, me more than him, and we’re sick of living unhealthily. I’ve been doing what I can to be better, but if I’m being honest with myself I haven’t been putting in 100 percent. After some serious discussions, we have finally decided to put our words into action, together. To make it more of a fun experience and an interesting way to adopt healthier habits, and help make them stick, we opted to have a wager.

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credit: Justyn Warner

After three months, the one who is closest to their personal goals first wins a cash prize and gets to choose the destination of our vacation. We still have to do our ‘before’ photos, take our measurements, have a weigh-in, then write out our goals. Once that’s all situated its game on.

 

All of my life I’ve been overweight. Sure I’ve had my moments where I would lose a significant amount of weight, but before I knew it the weight would pile back on. I was doing the work, yet I wasn’t being consistent with living a healthier lifestyle. I was only treating it as a temporary thing.

“I’ll do what I have to do now and eventually be able to incorporate x,y,z back into my diet.” Yes, I know, mistakes were made…

Sometimes people can incorporate things back into their lives and have the ability to control it. Due to having depression and anxiety, I am an emotional eater. I’m just someone that cannot incorporate junk back into my diet. It’s like an addiction, but with food. I need to keep the crap away.

I just love the fact I can do this lifestyle overhaul with my boyfriend and feel like I can stay consistent this time around. When we put our minds to something, we push each other to keep going. Living a healthier life is not only something we want, but something we need. It’s nice to have that non-judgmental support beside you blended with some playful competition. It feels so cliché to say, but he really is one of my best friends. I’m glad this is something else we can do to have fun together while improving ourselves in the process.

Side note: Making this post is something that will help us both remain accountable. If I don’t post an update about this in a while, someone please give me a swift kick to the butt to remind me to update you guys haha
* Paddy is not his actual name, it’s a nickname. He’s a fairly private guy, so I’m not going to put his name out there unless he wants me to.

“Write about something that happened when you were a child.”

 

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It was the early hours of the morning. It might have been a Saturday. I don’t recall if the

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(source: gettyimages)

loud pounding against our door had woken me, or if I was already awake. Next thing I knew I was sitting on the couch in the living room and a woman burst in, then began chasing my mothers’ boyfriend around the apartment. It had become an all out screaming match that was inching into a brawl. As much as I try I can’t recall was what being screamed between my mother and this woman while the boyfriend locked himself in the bathroom, but as an adult now I can only imagine the words that were exchanged.

I still remember sobbing, and the feeling of being terrified. The uncertainty of what was going to happen to us and the commotion unfolding was a lot for my six year old brain to process. What happened shortly after that is lost in the fog of my memories, but what I do remember next was the woman. This woman, who I viewed as a monster during this entire traumatic ordeal, approached me with a softness and kindness that I hadn’t expected. This monster was attempting to soothe me and calm me, reassure me that things were okay.

Afterward, the woman left. The coward left. And I was left there with yet another memory of an incident that should have never happened. It was another event in my young life that caused me to grow up too fast…